The second issue of DC Comics’ big summer storyline from Scott Snyder – Dark Nights: Metal – hit the stands this week, and the story is all over the place.

Dark Nights: Metal 2
Written by Scott Snyder 
Art by Greg Capullo, Jonathan Glapion and FCO Plascencia

As I mentioned in the review of the first issue, Batman continues to be a stand-offish dick to his brothers-in-arms in the Justice League, refusing to let them help him now that he knows that an evil entity is coming to the universe and it’s all his fault.

In case you forgot where we stood after the first issue, Superman sums everything up for us.

In the second issue, we find that the majority of the Justice League is chasing a group of Batmen – Nightwing, Batwing, Batwoman and other members of the Bat-family – led by Bruce’s son, Damian, as Bruce continues his mission with a dangerous weapon. Damian, of course, is still in his Robin suit, driving a “Bat-Hog.”

Since when does Cyborg fly? I don’t recall that being a thing.

The reveal of the fake Batmen leads to the confrontation you see in the main image, with Superman punching a hole right through the Dark Knight. But of course, it’s not actually Batman. No, it’s Clayface, the former Bat-villain who is now a member of Batman’s team in Detective Comics.

Anyway, the Batmen are a wild goose chase that leads the League right into the heart of The Green, and Swamp Thing is not a happy camper. But we don’t see how that plays out, as Snyder decides to just advance the story without a resolution to the Swamp Thing confrontation. Maybe that’ll be in a tie-in somewhere.

When Superman and Wonder Woman – Diana was caught up in the Swamp Thing kerfuffle – business picks up. The whole thing was a plot by the Snyder-created Court of Owls to douse Batman with the final element needed to open the doorway for Barbatos to invade. The element, of course, is the most dangerous element in the universe. And it is called Batmanium.

And of course, the Court of Owls douses Batman with the… ahem… Batmanium and Superman and Wonder Woman were left laying as the evil Batmen of the Dark Multiverse arrive. With that, we set up a series of tie-ins and one-shots to flesh out these new Big Bads, starting with a tie-in issue of Teen Titans this week.

Lest we think Batman didn’t have a plan to combat Barbatos, be not afraid. Batman always has a crazy-ass plan.

That would be Baby Darkseid, last seen at the end of Geoff Johns’ New 52 run of Justice League, in The Darkseid War. Batman’s plan to take out an evil from the Dark Multiverse is to let an infant New God use baby Omega Beams. The crazy just keeps on coming here. Baby Darkseid is left sitting on the floor watching the Dark Batmen at the end of the issue, so it’s anybody’s guess what’s going to happen. But I have no doubt it’ll be bad for everyone.

And as for the big reveal at the end of the first issue…

Daniel – Dream of the Endless – has little more than a cameo in the second issue. His role is to tell Batman that he can’t give him any more advice, but that he would offer his assistance if the nightmare comes to pass. Typical Dream. Was it really necessary to bring him in to this series? They have some more issues for Daniel’s part in this to expand, but it seems weird that they hyped his appearance at the end of the first issue to barely use him here.

Metal continues next week with the one-shot BATMAN: THE RED DEATH and a tie-in issue of NIGHTWING.